bitter hipster: March 2008 Archives

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The Bitter, Aging Hipster is nearing 40. He no longer enjoys the lavish attentions of the music, film and energy drink industries. (He actually thinks the energy drink industry has something to do with magic, or voodoo, or some shit.) But despite his anger at the unavoidable realization that he's no longer ad candy, the B,AH feels he has wisdom to pass on to the next generation of vapid, trendy, self-absorbed teens and twentysomethings who express their individuality by firmly entrenching themselves within a uniform group of like-minded kids who somehow still think they're all alone and misunderstood in the big bad world. So, every week, he answers two made-up questions about Living In The Mainstream While Still Pretending To Be Original with warmth, understanding and love. Except without those three things.

Dear B, AH,
I want to be able to land ollie inward heelflips on flat consistently before I start trying them down stairs or off ledges. But I haven't ever landed one. Every time I try, the board doesn't get all the way around, and I land on the side and roll my ankles. I think jumping down something might give the board enough time to finish flipping. Should I just go for it, or keep trying on flat until I can land them?
Bakerulz

hipster.gifThe Bitter, Aging Hipster is nearing 40. He no longer enjoys the lavish attentions of the music, film and energy drink industries. (He actually thinks the energy drink industry has something to do with magic, or voodoo, or some shit.) But despite his anger at the unavoidable realization that he's no longer ad candy, the B,AH feels he has wisdom to pass on to the next generation of vapid, trendy, self-absorbed teens and twentysomethings who express their individuality by firmly entrenching themselves within a uniform group of like-minded kids who somehow still think they're all alone and misunderstood in the big bad world. So, every week, he answers two made-up questions about Living In The Mainstream While Still Pretending To Be Original with warmth, understanding and love. Except without those three things.

Dear B,AH,
I like a lot of screamo and hardcore bands, but lately I can't help but feel like they all sound the same. Am I crazy? Which screamo band best embodies my own disenfranchisement, homicidal fantasies and sense of self?
KingCutter89




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This page is a archive of entries in the bitter hipster category from March 2008.

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